Lost
by CelticPrincessx3
Summary: He lost everything, one by one until he eventually lost himself. They were always supposed to be there for each other but in his pain he pushed her away and she ran. then someone came along and between the two of them can they heal his heart? CMP/K2/OC/WB
1. Chapter 1

A/N: I know I shouldn't be starting a new story but I just can't help it sometimes, these ideas come to my head and that's all there is to it. I came up with the idea for this story earlier in the week and now I'm finally getting the chance to write it. : ) It's a little different from the rest of my stories, at least I think it is. It's still a drama but it has a lot more to it than just a romantic drama so I hope you enjoy it. It is based off of the song "Emotionless" by Good Charlotte, "The Young and the Hopeless" by Good Charlotte, and "the Story of My Old Man" by Good charlotte. As well as "Perfect World" by simple plan among others. I want to thank Michelle [xgoneforwords] for helping me pick the title.

**Disclaimer: I do not own CM Punk, I don't think I'd want to, he's got a major attitude problem and I'd have to slap him a bit. : ) [ Just Kidding ] Seriously, he owns himself, obviously and so does Barbara Blank, and I'm sure WWE has rights to the name "Kelly Kelly" and they probably also have something to do with the name "Wade Barrett" I am in no way associated with World Wrestling Entertainment I do not own any names, logos, brands, trademarks, etc. No copyright infringement intended. I only own my OC Hannah.**

* * *

**Lost **

_"He left a bit too easily and with obvious relief. His feet were swift and sure on the muddy path."  
_Suzanne Finnamore

* * *

_Phil watched his dad pack his suitcase. He could hear the sound of his sister sobbing behind him and glanced over his shoulder at the smaller girl leaning against the wall. She had her knees pulled up to her chest with her arms wrapped tightly around her calves. Her jet black hair was falling in front of her glassy green eyes as she stared back at Phil. Phil felt his stomach turn as he came to the realization that this was real. As many times as his dad had threatened to leave he had never packed his bags, he had never ever bothered to pull that old beat up black suitcase out of the closet. Phil wasn't sure what he was feeling; maybe it was a little bit of everything rolled into one. Anger, fear, sadness, resentment, he was feeling emotions he had never felt before in his life. The twelve year old stepped out of his father's way as he walked through the door. "Daddy are you really leaving?" he heard his sister ask as she quickly ran after him. Their father did not acknowledge his daughter's question. _

_Phil followed his nine year old sister as she ran down the stairs. "Hannah," Phil said. He wanted nothing more than to protect her from this. He wished that she hadn't been home this time, that she could had been at a friend's house playing, so she didn't have to watch her father get in his car and drive away, so she didn't have to see that he was going to just leave, without any explanation at all. He didn't want his sister to watch her father pull out of the drive away without knowing if she would ever see him again. _

_He followed his sister through the front door and out onto the lawn. His sister stood by the car as their father opened the trunk and dropped his suitcase inside. "Daddy I want to go with you. Daddy you can't go." Hannah pleaded as the tears rolled out of her green eyes and down her pink cheeks. _

"_Don't be silly Hannah, go inside with your brother." He said as she slammed the lid down on the trunk. _

_The little girl shook her head and stood in front of the driver side door. "You can't leave us daddy, we need you. Take us with you." She begged as she looked up at him. _

"_Get out of the way Hannah, now." Her father ordered as he looked down at her. Phil realized he didn't sound torn, hurt, guilty or sad. He didn't sound like he felt anything. He didn't care that he was leaving them behind. He wanted to be rid of them. _

_Hannah shook her head, she was just a stubborn as he was and this was not the time to show it. Her father pushed her out of the way and the little girl fell to the ground, looking shocked. The tears welled up in her eyes again but her father didn't even bother to look down at her. _

_Phil had heard enough, seen enough. He was livid, hurt, lost. He rushed forward and struck his father as hard as he could. _

"_Phil no." He heard Hannah's voice and felt her arms wrap around him but it was no use, he was past reason. He gently removed himself from his sister's grip to meet a slap across the face from his father. _

"_Both of you get in the house now, I don't want to hear another word from you!" his father bellowed as he got in the car and slammed the door shut. Phil quickly grabbed his sister and pulled her away from the car as his father started the engine. _

_He didn't even look at them as he pulled out of the drive way and sped away._

* * *

_**Dear Dad, **_

_**We do miss you. I don't understand how you could do this to us. How could you just leave and never come back. It has been three months and you are still gone. Are you ever coming home? I'm not even sure where I should send this letter….**_

* * *

_Phil looked up from the sheet of lose leaf paper he was writing on as his bedroom door opened. Hannah stood there, wearing her princess pajamas and holding her hair brush. "Phil mommy won't help me, will you?" she asked as she approached him. _

_He smiled weakly at his little sister and took the brush from her hands. "I'll do my best Hannah," he said, "sit down." _

_The little girl sat down in front of him and he brushed her hair. "Are you going to braid it Phil?" she questioned. _

"_I can try Hannah but I'm not mom; I'm really not good at this stuff." He said as she slowly separated her hair into three sections, trying to remember what he saw his mom do._

* * *

_**Dear Dad, **_

_**I'm starting to believe that you are never coming back. It has been two years now and mom barely leaves her room. I still have no clue where to send this to. I realize know that you don't love us. If you loved us you would have come back. You would have told us how to talk to you but you don't care. Maybe you never cared.**_

* * *

_Phil sat the notebook down as he heard the oh-so familiar steps of his little sister walking into his room. "Coming to get your hair done?" he asked as he looked up at his little sister. She nodded and approached him, holding out the hair brush. "Have a seat Hannah." He said. She did as she was told and he began to brush her wet, tangled, raven hair. If there was anything positive about the last two years it was that he felt infinitely closer to his sister. He used the brush to separate her hair into three sections. His mother barely talked, she went to work, fed them, went to bed. He slowly braided her hair before wrapping her in a tight hug. "I know this is hard Hannah Grace but I promise I will always be here for you, no matter what."_

* * *

"_When's the last time she's come out of there?" Hannah asked him as she slung her book bag over her shoulder. _

"_It's been at least a week." Phil said with a shrug. "We better get going or we'll be late for school" _

"_There's really not much stopping us from skipping Phil, our mother doesn't even acknowledge that we exist anymore. We could easily stay home and watch the entire batman series."_

"_Don't tempt me Hannah." He said lightly shoving her in the direction of the front door. "I'm supposed to be looking out for you, now we can watch all of the batman movies when we get home…our mother isn't around to tell us when to do our homework and go to bed." He corrected as he grabbed his car keys off the table. "And in a few weeks we'll take you to get your driver's permit….I think someone's birthday is coming up." He said as they walked outside and they closed the door. "What do you want for your birthday anyway?" he questioned. _

"_Same thing that I want every year and we'll never get it…" she said looking down at the ground, "to be a family again."_

* * *

_**Dear Dad. **_

_**I do hate you. I never thought I could but I do. How could you do this to us? Mom's gone and it's just me and Hannah, she's seventeen now you know. She's grown up to be amazing, no thanks to you. At least she has one person around to be proud of her…**_

* * *

"_You look beautiful Hannah." Phil smiled as she watched her sister come out down the stairs. She wore a crimson dress with silver heels and jewelry. It had taken three weeks' worth of pay for Phil to buy the dress but, it was worth it. In his mind it was worth it just to see the smile on her face. "Thank you Phil." He could see the guilt in her eyes but, he knew deep down, on some level, that she was happy she could go to her prom. _

"_Don't thank me Hannah, this is what you are supposed to do. You look beautiful and I want you to have fun tonight. Promise you will have fun and you won't feel guilty." He stood up from his sitting position on the couch and approached his sister. _

_She smiled weakly and nodded. "I'll have fun Phil…Thank you." She wrapped her arms around him in a hug, which he returned. He smiled and kissed her lightly on the forehead before letting her go. She walked over to the door then turned and looked over her shoulder. "I love you Phil." _

"_I love you too sis." He smiled as she walked out and closed the door._

* * *

_**Dad,**_

_**You missed everything today. It was such an amazing day. Hannah graduated. She was the top of her class. We've moved on, we're better off now. We have everything we need in each other and we don't need you or anyone else. We're strong…**_

* * *

_Phil watched as his sister, her black hair curled around her face, a white cap on her head, approached the podium on the large stage. She stood, a bright smile on her face and said… _

"_Today is the start of something new, something unknown. The unknown can be scary, it can be downright terrifying…. But sometimes there is beauty in it. Sometimes there is beauty in the unknown. When something is unknown you have to jump forth and claim it…make it your own. Sometimes you fail, you will trip, and stumble and fall, but every fall will make you better, make you stronger. Eventually you will be so strong that nothing can stop you, nothing will stand in your way. You will be so strong that this newness, the darkness, the unknown will no longer scare you… it will become a journey, a quest and you are on a mission to make a name, to create you, and to become all that you can be. To claim what is yours. I know a lot of you, and if I don't than I can tell you one thing you may or may not know about yourself… you will make it, you are strong and you will find what is yours and you will take it. It may take you five tries, twenty tries or hundred tries but you will find it and it will be yours. Make a mistake, make another, make as many as you need until you find what you are looking for. Just make sure you never give up, because the second you give up you have lost yourself and all that is yours. So be strong, stand tall and go out there and claim what is yours and never, ever give up. _

_Phil smiled and stood, along with everyone else in attendance and clapped._

* * *

"_She's lovely Phil. Are you going to ask her out?" Hannah asked as they walked home from his co-worker Amy's house. _

"_I can't; she has a boyfriend" Phil said, trying to hide the bitterness in his voice. It was impossible though, Hannah knew him too well. _

"_I'm guessing someone doesn't like him." _

"_He doesn't treat her right, she could do better." He said. _

"_Don't worry Phil, someday she'll wake up and see what is right in front of her." Hannah said as she draped and arm over his shoulders. "And then, she will be yours."_

* * *

Phil clutched the oak wood coffin as she stared down at her unmoving features. It didn't even look like her, her green eyes were unmoving and her skin looked fake and unflattering. The black dress she wore was not something she would have chosen to wear and her hair would have made her cringe, the red locks were tied up in curls. They had far too much make up on her eyes and she resembled a badly dressed and made up mannequin. He almost reached out a hand to touch her but then changed his mind. He turned his head as tears began to form in his hazel eyes. Everything about this was unfair. She was far too young. She didn't deserve to die, she deserve to live. He hated him for taking that away from her.

Phil fought the rage that turned his stomach and shut his eyes form a minute.

"Phil," he heard a whisper and he opened his eyes and looked into the face of his little sister. "Phil, I'm so sorry, I know this is so hard on you." He finally turned away from the casket as she fell into his sister's embrace. "Don't worry Phil, I'm here for you."

* * *

A/N: The whole point in this chapter was to give you some insight into Punk and Hannah's relationship. Next Chapter will be different from this one and it will focus on the present, not the past. _**I really hope you enjoyed this and reviews would be appreciated, let me know what you think about the concept of this story**_ : ) Also you can follow me on Twitter at either **xCelitcPrincess **or **MsDanieLynn** : ) Besos, Danie.

~Edited 5/13/13


	2. Chapter 2

**an**: Okay, I know I said I would post "What About Now" before I wrote another chapter for this but I'm just going where the inspiration is so this is getting updated first. This chapter is going to be just as sad as the first one so I'll warn you of that ahead of time. I still hope you enjoy it and it'll pick up a little in chapter three…hopefully : ) Anyways….

**Disclaimer: I do not own CM Punk, I don't think I'd want to, he's got a major attitude problem and I'd have to slap him a bit. : ) [ Just Kidding ] Seriously, he owns himself, obviously and so does Barbara Blank, and I'm sure WWE has rights to the name "Kelly Kelly" and they probably also have something to do with the name "Wade Barrett" I am in no way associated with World Wrestling Entertainment I do not own any names, logos, brands, trademarks, etc. No copyright infringement intended. I only own my OC Hannah.**

* * *

**Lost**

_"Already things are changing; it´s starting with small shit but oh it´s starting, the change, the irrevocable, impossible change."_  
Suzanne Finnamore

* * *

**8 Weeks Later**

* * *

Hannah ascended the stairs, "Phil?" She turned at the top of the stairs and made her way toward his bedroom door. The raven haired girl stood there for a second, the door was cracked and a small amount of light flooded out, reflecting on the hard wood floors. "Phil?" she questioned quietly. She could hear the sound of her older brother's sobs.

She blinked away the tears that were forming in her olive green eyes. It killed her seeing her older brother in so much pain. Just to look at him, his eyes red and swollen from tears and lack of sleep, that unchanging look of despair reflecting back at her, made her heart break. He rarely left the house. It pained her to realize he was beginning to act just like their mother after their father left. He would go to work, on occasion eat, and then go to his room. He never wanted to do anything anymore. He seemed so broken, so lost. Hannah pushed open the door.

Her brother was sitting, frozen, on the side of the bed. She didn't need to look at his face to know he had been crying again. "Phil…" Hannah cleared the distance between the door and his bed in seconds and wrapped him in a tight embrace. "Phil, what can I do?" she questioned.

She had no idea how to take care of anyone. Phil had always taken care of her, now he was the one who needed help and she was in no position to give it. She gently rubbed her brother's back. She couldn't even remember how many times her brother had consoled her, after their dad left, after their mother left, after her boyfriend left her, when her best friend moved away… He was the rock, he was her support. She had no idea how she could transition herself to be his shoulder to cry on, his rock, his foundation.

But she knew she had to do it.

"Phil, it's going to be okay. I know you don't want to hear this but Amy is in a better place. I know you believe that. She isn't hurting anymore. No one can hurt her. I know it hurts but she wouldn't want to see you like this. She wouldn't want to know that you are giving up because she is gone. She would want you to carry on. I know it doesn't feel right to do that right now but it's true. I will always be here for you Phil. I will do whatever I can for you. "

* * *

**18 Months later**

* * *

Hannah quickly set the table. Phil would be home from work any minute and she was sure he would be hungry. He was still mopey, sad, distant, and unbelievably broken but he was at least eating and sleeping better. The twenty-three year old pulled her black hair back into a pony tail and sat the baking dish filled with homemade macaroni and cheese on the center of the table. She smiled when she heard the door open and the sound of Phil dropping his keys on the stand beside the door. She threw two pepsis on the table before running down the hall and into the living room.

"Hey Phil! How was your day?" She was about to run up to him and hug him but stopped when he raised a hand. He was standing, frozen by the couch, he turned to face her and she was surprised to find that he looked angry. "Phil what's wrong?"

"Hannah, what is wrong with you?" he questioned, she knew that look in his hazel eyes. He was angry, and hurt.

The only problem is she wasn't sure _why _he was angry and hurt. She couldn't remember doing anything that might upset her older brother. She inched her way closer to her brother, looking at him curiously. "What do you mean?" she questioned when she was closer to him.

"What do I mean? I mean what were you thinking?" Her brother reached out and picked up two things off the coffee table. A wine glass and a half full bottle of blackberry Merlot. "Were you drinking Hannah?" he questioned as he showed her the glass and the bottle.

"Yea. What's the big deal? I'm over twenty one. I mean I know that you don't like it Phil, but that doesn't mean that I can't have a glass once in a while." Hannah couldn't understand why he was so upset. She had a glass and a half of wine after working all day. "Phil I had a glass and a half. I haven't gone anywhere, I'm not drunk, it was harmless."

"Harmless?" he poured some more wine into the glass and then sat it down. "This ruins lives Hannah, Alcohol kills people. Don't you understand that." He motioned to the glass and the bottle like it was a teaching aide.

"Phil one glass of wine is not going to kill me. Are you okay?" she questioned. She was worried now. Her brother had been acting so strangely since the death of the woman he loved. She could understand it, she was with someone else, he never got the chance to tell her, but she had hoped he was getting better. "Just calm down okay, dinner is on the table, why don' t we go eat?"

"Calm down, just calm down and let you ruin life, let you leave me. Yes, I'll stay calm Hannah. I'll let you ruin your life so you can end up just like them!"

"What are you talking about? Does this have to do with Amy?" she questioned. She moved forward to hug her brother but he backed away. "Phil talk to me. I'm sorry I didn't mean to upset you. I didn't see the harm in…"

"You didn't see the harm in drinking? You don't understand what alcohol can cause Hannah? You of all people should know! You have seen it first hand! Hannah, this is the reason dad left, this is the reason that we lost mom, this is the reason Amy is dead! Can't you see this? Don't you realize what pain this causes, or don't you care? Are you so set on having fun and goofing around that you don't care that THIS is what ruined our lives." He picked up the bottle and glass on the table.

"Phil. Dad left because he didn't care anymore. Mom left because dad broke her heart… and Amy died in a car accident." She never knew that this would cause her brother so much pain. "Amy chose to get into that car, she didn't die BECAUSE of alcohol, she died because she made a bad decision. I am so sorry you lost her, I am so sorry we lost dad, but I'm not them. I won't make the same mistakes that they did."

She watched as Phil stood silent for a moment than in one swift motion he threw the entire glass of wine onto her. She backed away and looked down at her shirt than back at him. "How can you say those things?" She saw a look in his eyes that she had never seen before. He was livid, he was seething; she hadn't seen him this angry since the day their father left. She never thought he could look at her that way. "Amy died because her boyfriend was an alcoholic, he made her go to that stupid show with him. She was supposed to be here with us watching movies and having a good time and instead he got wasted and wrecked his car. That bastard is still alive and she is dead. How can you even try to make it seem like this is okay? You had to know how this would make me feel. I have nothing and no one besides you Hannah and I gave up everything for you, I did everything for you. I dropped out of high school and worked so I could support you and you repay me by taking the same path he took. You don't want to end up like him do you? Do you?" She stared at him in shock. He took a step closer to her. "If this is how you are going to choose to live your life than you might as well just pack your bags and leave now because I don't want to sit around and wait for you to do it later."

"Phil.." she whispered. She was terrified. This was a side of her brother she had never seen before.

"NOW!" he screamed.

She backed away, the tears welling up in her green eyes, and with one last look at her brother she spun around and ran up the stairs.

* * *

Phil watched as his sister stormed out of the house, a suitcase in her hand and a look on her face that broke his heart. He knew he had made a terrible mistake but yet he couldn't bring himself to chase her down and tell her to stay. She had broken his heart all over again, but he knew he was being selfish. He couldn't force her to live the life he wanted her to live. He couldn't make her be straight edge like him. On some level he knew she would have always be there for him yet he had screamed at her for drinking a glass and half of wine. He had finally hit rock bottom. He had pushed away any form of happiness in his life.

He had spent his whole life trying to make sure that he didn't pick up a drink, that he stayed responsible, that he worked hard, that he didn't end up like him.

Phil found himself on his knees in the living room, he heard the engine of his sister jeep as she pulled out of the drive way and drove away to who knows where. She really had nowhere to go and he had just thrown her out. As he looked around the empty room he came to a realization that made his stomach clench.

He didn't even have to pick up a drink to end up like him. He did it all on his own. _He was alone and completely miserable._

* * *

_**an. ** Well that's it for chapter two. I hope you guys liked it and I hope it seemed believable for you guys. reviews would be appreciated! Besos! Danie._


	3. Chapter 3

**a/n. **I'm back. Did you miss me? Ha-ha. Seriously, it has been quite some time since I've written and update on here….so sorry for that. I picked this one because; well it's the most thought out so far. Hope you guys enjoy this update!

_**Disclaimer: I do not own CM Punk, I don't think I'd want to, he's got a major attitude problem and I'd have to slap him a bit. : ) [ Just Kidding ] Seriously, he owns himself, obviously and so does Barbara Blank, and I'm sure WWE has rights to the name "Kelly Kelly" and they probably also have something to do with the name "Wade Barrett" I am in no way associated with World Wrestling Entertainment I do not own any names, logos, brands, trademarks, etc. No copyright infringement intended. I only own my OC Hannah.**_

* * *

**Lost **

_"Have you ever lost someone you love and wanted one more conversation, one more chance to make up for the time when you thought they would be here forever?"  
_Mitch Albom

* * *

**Six Months Later**

* * *

Phil knelt down in the grass; his long black hair fell in his face as he leaned over the tombstone. He found himself running his fingers across her name as the tears fell from his hazel eyes.

_Amy Dumas _

Amy… Phil shook his head trying to shake away the memories, the guilt, the hate, everything. He shivered in the cold October air. His birthday was coming up… he wasn't even concerned with it. It was just another day he was going to spend alone.

He looked around the graveyard as he folded his arms over his chest. _Maybe it was about time he joined them. _He knew he shouldn't think that way but he couldn't help it. What _exactly _did he have left to live for? Yea, he had a sister, a sister who took of six months before and hadn't contacted him since.

"_You should have her buried on the hill. You know how much Amy loved the city at night…she should be able to see it all of the time." Hannah said to Phil, Mr. and Mrs. Dumas as they all sat in their living room. _

The Dumas's had agreed with Hannah. Sitting there now he looked out at the city, some lights were on as the sun began to set. Why had it mattered? She was dead, she couldn't see the beauty of the city lights, the sunrise, the snow, the rain, and the sun shining…she couldn't see anything.

Phil looked back the headstone. He wiped the tears away from his puffy eyes. He was aware how swollen his eyes were. The dark circles and bags beneath them from lack of sleep and the obvious amount of weight he lost made him look like death itself. He laughed bitterly… what a way to describe himself. He was dead, he was cold and dead, at least on the inside.

"I really want to call her, I really want to find her and beg her to come home." He cursed himself for letting Hannah walk away. Yes, he had told her to go but he found it unbelievable that she actually did. She really thought he wanted her to leave, that he would through her out?

The raven haired man scoffed. Why was she so stubborn? Why was _he _so stubborn?

He wasn't even sure he would be able to find her…it was unlikely she kept her cellphone…even though he still paid it. He hoped every day that he would wake up and find a text or a missed call, that when he came home from work it would ring and his little sister would be on the other end. He hated being alone.

Phil pulled the weeds away from the headstone before rising from the ground. He stole one last glance at the headstone before turning and walking away. He took the trail through the woods that led to the suburbs where he lived. He pulled the hood of his sweatshirt over his head when he reached his street and walked quickly toward his home, ignoring the awkward stars from his neighbors.

As he walked through the gate he noticed the large U-Haul parked next door and stopped to steal a glance at his new neighbors. A petite blonde grabbed a box out of the back of the U-Haul and carried it onto the porch. She stopped when she noticed him and waved, smiling brightly. Phil waved and quickly went inside.

The last thing he wanted, or needed, was a friendly, beautiful, new neighbor.

* * *

Hannah brushed her red bangs out of her green eyes and looked around helplessly. She watched as shoppers threw lumber, screws and nails into carts. What made her think she was strong enough to work here? Home Depot was not the easiest place for a thin girl to work, especially hauling lumber.

She groaned and picked up one of the boards she was supposed to move and spun around, trying to turn it so she could drop it on the cart.

The sound of a loud grunt and the force of the board stopping in mid-swing knocked Hannah off her feet and she fell down with the board on top of her.

She looked up, shocked, to find a, rather tall, man holding his stomach. She had obviously whacked him with the board in her attempt to put it on the cart. "I'm so sorry." She gasped as she scrambled to her feet. "I didn't even know you were there sir, are you alright?" she stared hopefully at the man.

His lips curved into a smile and he laughed. "Yes, yes I'm fine." He had an accent. "Are you alright?" he questioned, his green eyes taking her in for the first time, "it looks like you were having some trouble with that."

Hannah laughed nervously and nodded. "it's a little heavy, I am really sorry I hit you with the board sir."

"No worries." He assured her as he laughed again, noticing the bright red hue to her cheeks. "I was coming to ask you if you could help me find deck boards." He ran his fingers through his curly black hair.

"Yes, of course… they are in the next aisle." She looked up at the clock. "I get off in ten minutes…just give me a minute to pick up this board and I will help you before I punch out."

The raven haired man nodded and she pulled the board up onto the cart, with some difficulty. Once it was safely on the cart and unlikely to harm anyone else she took the stranger into the next aisle, pushing another cart as she went. "Are you building a deck?"

"Yes, I just moved here…I'm from Manchester. My wife died a few years ago and I thought maybe a change of scenery would help." He said looking for the boards he wanted. When he found them he began placing them on the cart.

"I'm sorry for your loss." She said. She was reminded, momentarily of her older brother. She wanted desperately to call him but she feared he was still angry with her. So she died her hair, got a job at the Home Depot and bought a loft with a bedroom the size of broom cupboard in Boston. Wasn't she living every twenty-something year old girl's dream.

"Thank you" he smiled weakly and looked at her name tag, "Hannah".

She smiled and pushed the cart toward the counter for him before going out back and clocking out. Once she had dropped her name tag and vest in her locker she went out to her SUV. She slid in the front seat, looking forward to going home and enjoying a good movie and plate full of take out. She started the engine and drove away, glad she had the next day off.

* * *

**A/N: Okay, hopefully this chapter wasn't quite as sad. We got to meet Wade : ) How cool is that! Although she doesn't know his name yet… Hope you enjoyed it… Reviews would be appreciated, please? **


	4. Chapter 4

**an: **For some reason I always seem to come back to this story when it's time to update. I don't know why. I must really love this idea. **Disclaimer:** I only own the plot and Hannah, My OC.

* * *

**Lost **_  
_

_"You never know what you have till you've lost it."  
_Alyson Noel

* * *

"Hey Hannah."

Hannah spun around at the sound of her name and found herself staring into a rather familiar pair of olive green eyes. His lips curved into a smile as he picked up the board she had been trying to carry and tossed into onto the stack beside them.

"Hi Wade." The red-head smiled at the man standing beside her. "Thanks, I appreciate that."

"No problem." He smiled.

"Did you forget something yesterday," the red-head asked. Wade had made it a point of coming almost every day she worked for the last two weeks. Most days he said he forgot something, or he said he was starting some new project at his house. "Or are you starting another new project? Your house can't be in _that _bad of shape can it?"

He laughed as he raked his fingers through his wavy black hair. "No, no. I have to admit Hannah I haven't been quite honest with you." He said as he followed the red-head to her next destination, a paint aisle, where she began to stock the shelves.

"What do you mean," Hannah questioned as she stuck a can of paint on the top shelf.

"Well, my house was newly renovated when I arrived. I haven't been working on the place… except for the deck."

"Then why were you in here buying pipes, paint, a faucet, and brushes?" Hannah listed a few of the random items the raven haired man had bought over the last two weeks.

"I had to have a reason to come see you." He said simply. He shrugged his broad shoulders and smiled sheepishly at her.

Hannah wasn't sure she heard him right. _He was coming to see her? _"Me?" she questioned.

"Yes, when I came in to get the boards for the deck, I found you rather…enchanting. I wanted to talk to you again but I didn't have the guts to tell you that then, or the day after, or the day after that, hence here I am." He held out his arms and smiled.

"Wow." She laughed.

"What?" he said indignantly, folding his arms over his chest.

"How much money did you waste trying to talk to me?"

His cheeks flushed a little and his eyes shifted to the ground, "Well, two-hundred and forty-seven dollars."

Hannah laughed again as she stocked the last can of paint, "Well I guess, for two-hundred and forty-seven dollars, I _could _hear you out," she teased.

"That's very kind of you Hannah." He smiled. "So I can ask you to come to dinner with me tonight?"

The red-headed thought it over momentarily and then nodded. "I guess you could convince me to have dinner with you." She smiled. "What time?"

"How about I pick you up at seven?"

Hannah nodded, "Okay, Wade. I'll meet you here." The red-head waved as she turned and walked toward the break room. It was time to clock out.

* * *

Hannah gave herself a once-over in her floor-length mirror. The olive green dress she decided to wear accented her eyes and the sliver heels and jewelry added a simple, yet, elegant touch. Her red-hair was curled loosely. She smiled weakly at her own reflection before turning away and picking up her purse.

_Six-thirty three. _

She would have to leave soon to meet Wade. Her heart raced a little, wondering if it was a bad idea. She knew next to nothing about the Englishman but did anyone really know much about who they date… wasn't that the point in dating after all, to get to know the person?

For a moment she wished Phil was there so she could ask him if she was doing the right thing.

She looked at the calendar. It was his birthday. She wanted nothing more than to call him and wish him a happy birthday, to know that he was alright. She hoped he had _someone _to spend his birthday with, a friend, maybe a new girlfriend.

She shook her head. That was unlikely; she didn't think Phil would be ready to move on yet.

Should she call and check on him? Should she just call and wish him a happy birthday? Would he even answer the phone?

The red head pulled her cell-phone out of her purse and scrolled down her list of contacts, stopping on her brother's name, she pushed the small green button.

* * *

Phil flipped through the channels on his TV. He had seen all of these movies a hundred times. He turned off the TV and tossed the remote onto the couch beside him. Sighing heavily, he leaned back and covered his face with his hands.

The day wasn't over, maybe she would call and he would be there to answer. He really believed his sister would try to wish him a happy birthday. Of the two, Hannah was always the better person. She was always the quickest to forgive, to forget, to apologize and she was also the braver of the two. He was honestly surprised she hadn't returned home yet.

Phil stood up and went to the kitchen to retrieve a Pepsi, leaving his cordless-phone on the coffee table. He grabbed the blue can out of the refrigerator and a bag of chips off the counter. Not much of a dinner but he didn't feel like cooking, because it would probably turn out disgusting anyway, and he didn't feel like putting up with a delivery man. He slammed the refrigerator shut as the phone began to ring. He made his way back to the living room as the phone continued to ring. He began to look at the stack of movies on the movie rack, looking for something entertaining to watch while he ate. He ignored the phone as the answering machine picked up and he heard the sound of his own voice:

_Hey, you've reached Phil, either I'm working or I don't feel like talking to you. If you want leave a message, I probably won't call you back. _

The raven haired man grunted at his message, than the sound of a familiar voice caused his head to jerk toward the machine.

_Hey Phil, it's, uh, me Hannah. I know it's been a while, I'm sure you're busy but that's okay. I just wanted to wish you a happy birthday…_ Phil ran quickly to the other side of the living room. The raven haired man dropped his bag of chips and unopened Pepsi onto the couch and quickly reached out to grab the phone. _I hope I hear from you soon. Bye. _He clicked the button.

"Hello Hannah. Hannah are you there?"

But all he heard on the other end of the line was silence.

That was the call he had been waiting for all day and he missed it.

* * *

**an: **Next chapter will be Hannah's date AND Phil will see someone he hasn't seen in awhile.

What did you guys think of this chapter. Reviews would be appreciated, like always. :) Besos! Danie.


	5. Chapter 5

**an**: Well I really hope you enjoy this update and_ remember I only own Hannah and this kind of crazy plot!_

* * *

**Lost **

_"...he had a way of taking your hand which made it clear he'd have to be the one to let go."  
_Alice Hoffman

* * *

Phil couldn't believe he missed Hannah's call. He closed his hazel eyes and shook his head in frustration. He thought about calling her back but he wasn't sure he was strong enough. He looked around the empty room and felt a pang of regret in his chest. He was completely alone, on his birthday, and it was _his _fault.

Phil flopped down on the couch and turned on the cordless phone. He dialed the oh-so-familiar number of his favorite pizza place and ordered a deep dish peperoni pizza with onions and peppers and a two liter of Pepsi before hanging up. He fiddled with the phone in his hands as he thought about what he would say to Hannah if he called her.

The self-proclaimed punk dialed his little sister's number and held the phone to his ear. He listened as it rang, than it went to voice-mail and he heard his sister's voice for the second time that night:

_Hey, it's Hannah, I'm probably busy but if you leave me a message I promise I'll call you back! _

He heard the beep and was about to speak but he couldn't find the words he wanted to say. _Hannah I miss you. Hannah thank you for calling me on my birthday. Hannah I should have been the bigger man, I should have called you months ago to apologize. Hannah I miss you, please come home… _

Phil quickly pulled the phone away from his ear and hung up. He cursed himself as he threw the phone. The handset hit the wall with a crash and smashed, pieces flying in several different directions. _You couldn't swallow your pride and apologize? Maybe she's better off, wherever she's at, without you_.

That thought made his heart sink. He wanted Hannah to be happy, but he couldn't bear the thought, that maybe, possibly, she was happier without him in her life. Hannah had to miss him, at least a little bit. He was all she had.

The sound of a knock at the door brought Phil out of his thoughts. The twenty-six year old opened the door, pulling out his wallet.

"Pizza delivery for Brooks," the sound of a familiar voice caused Phil's head to pop up. He stared into the brown eyes of the man across from him. "Wow, look who it is…" the brown haired man took the pizza out of the warmer and held it out to him, "how have you been Punky, long time no talk."

Phil knew he was glaring. He could feel his body shaking with rage as he stared into that all-too-familiar face. Phil seized the pizza from the older man with shaking hands and opened it.

"Matt." He heard his voice, it sounded nothing like his own, it was a low growl and he noticed that it made the other man look nervous.

"That's nineteen ninety-five."

Phil pulled a twenty out of his wallet and put it into Matt's out-stretched hand. The brown-haired man turned to leave but Punk stepped out onto the porch. Phil couldn't contain himself.

"How do you sleep at night?" he asked the other man.

"What do you mean?" Matt asked. He furrowed his dark eyebrows as he stared questionably at Phil.

"I said how do you sleep at night… do you even think about her? Do you have nightmares? Don't you hate yourself like you should, don't you wake up every morning and look in the mirror and wish that it was you instead of her, because IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN!"

Matt shook his head. "No, I don't. I made a mistake Phil. What I did was wrong but it _was _a mistake. I know Amy would forgive me, maybe you should think about that." Matt turned to walk away but Phil seized his arm.

"_How dare you say her name. Forgive you? Why would I ever forgive you? You __**killed **__her Matt."_ Punk was inches away from the other man's face. He wanted to hurt him, to make him feel the pain he had been feeling for the last two years. He wanted him to pay for taking the woman he loved away from him. He wanted _revenge. _

Matt shoved him away, "Back off Punk. I've got a job to do." Matt turned around and began to walk toward the car.

_He was not going to get away, not again. _Phil lunged at the larger man, knocking him off his feet. "You are the reason Amy is dead, you bastard, you are the reason she is gone!" Phil punched the other man repeatedly. He felt the rage pour out him as he beat the man pinned to the ground, the man who had taken everything away from him.

Matt punched, his fist colliding with the side of Phil's head. He repeated the motion until Phil finally fell to the grass. Now Matt held him down, punching him. Phil fought back, the sound of screams from his neighbors barely audible as he fought.

He punched Matt again, as hard as he could, and the other man's head connected with the concrete. Phil brought his fist up to punch again when a hand, much smaller than his own, wrapped around it.

"Stop; please," A female voice said.

Phil turned and found himself staring into the light blue eyes of his new neighbor. The blonde seized his shoulders and pulled him away from Matt's limp body. _He had lost it. _

He felt the hot sting of tears in his hazel eyes when saw the flashing lights and he heard the sound of sirens. The black and white police cars pulled up in front of his house. The cops swarmed around him, pushing the concerned blonde to the side. He didn't object as they placed him in handcuffs and led him toward an awaiting squad car.

* * *

Hannah parked her car in front of the Home Depot. The red-head looked around the parking lot, looking for some sign of Wade. She tapped the steering wheel nervously as she awaited his arrival. She must be crazy doing this.

She really wished Phil had answered the phone. He would have told her if this was a bad idea. She didn't think Wade was playing her, or dangerous, or anything like that, but that didn't stop her from worrying.

She felt her heart race as a black car pulled up beside her truck and Wade stepped out. The British man walked over to her door and pulled the door open. "Hello Hannah. Are you ready for dinner?" he asked.

For a minute, Hannah thought about grabbing the door, slamming it shut and driving away.

_Stop it Hannah you are being silly. _

"Yea, I'm ready." She said as she climbed out of the truck and he closed the door. She locked it and followed him to his car. The raven-haired man pulled the door open for her; she thanked him before sliding into the passenger seat. Seconds later he was behind the wheel and backing the car out of the parking space.

"You look stunning Hannah." He said, his olive eyes focused on the road.

"Thank you." She replied, she looked out the window.

"I'm glad you agreed to have dinner with me tonight Hannah." He said as he turned off of the main road onto a rather secluded side street.

"Where are we heading Wade?" the red-head asked, "aren't all of the restaurants in the city."

The British man smiled, "well I actually made you dinner Hannah, is that okay?" he asked. She noticed, for the first time, that he actually sounded nervous. He glanced at her.

Hannah suddenly felt guilty. She shouldn't have been suspicious of Wade, he wasn't dangerous. She knew that. She smiled and nodded. "That sounds lovely Wade."

"Good." She heard the relief in his voice and wanted to giggle. He was obviously trying too hard to make everything perfect.

Wade pulled into a long driveway. Hannah's eyes focused on the large brick house in front of her. The lawn was immaculate, there were two large bay windows, one on the bottom floor and one on the second floor, the garage door was open and Wade parked the car inside.

"Wow, your house is huge." Hannah said as she stepped out of the car. She followed Wade to the door that attached the garage to the house and followed him inside.

"It is a little large, sometimes it feels rather empty." He said as he closed the door behind her.

Hannah looked around the kitchen, the counter tops were light granite and the cupboards were made of beautiful cherry red wood. It was large, with a lot of counter space and a large island. "This is beautiful."

"Thank you." He said, "Maybe I should give you a tour?" he questioned.

"I'd love that." She nodded. She laced her arm through his as he showed her room after room.

The living room was large, with the beautiful bay window, hardwood floors and a piano. "Can you play?" Hannah asked as she ran her fingers over the instrument.

"No, my wife played. I couldn't leave it in England. She cherished her piano. It's unfortunate that it has to sit and collect dust, but like I said, she cherished it, thus I've grown to cherish it as well."

Hannah nodded her head. "I understand, it is lovely, I've always wanted to learn to play."

"Well maybe someday you will." He said as he led her into and office. The large desk was made of cherry-wood, like most of the furniture in his home. "This is an office, there's not much interesting in here." He said.

Hannah looked at the numerous books on the walls. "Do you like to read?"

"Yes." He said.

"So do I." Hannah smiled at him as she looked around the room taking everything in. Huge, three large windows, at least a thousand books, three chairs, a beautiful desk, filing cabinets, and everything was organized.

"I love it."

He smiled, pleased by her enthusiasm as he showed her a formal dining room with a large chandelier. The large table was set with tall white candles which were burning. The window was open and showed the view of the trees behind his house. Wade led her to the table and pulled out a chair.

"Thank you" she took a seat as she watched the flame on the candle dance in the dim light. "You've really outdone yourself Wade."

She never expected this on a simple dinner date.

"I was hoping you'd like it." He smiled; he turned and left the room through a wooden swinging door. Hannah stared out the large window into the yard. This wasn't what she had expected it to be, it was better.

A few minutes later Wade returned with a large bowl and placed it on the table. "I wasn't exactly sure what you like Hannah, so I made pasta. Is that alright?" he asked.

"I love pasta, actually." She smiled. He returned the smile as he filled her plate with pasta, than did the same with his own. "This looks amazing." She said.

"I hope you like it." He said, pouring her a glass of red wine. She looked at the crimson liquid and thought, momentarily, of her big brother.

"I'm sure it will be amazing." She assured him as he sat down across from her.

"Please tell me more about yourself Hannah." He said.

"Well I was born and raised in Chicago. I have a big brother, but we haven't talked much lately. I love animals, I'm a vegetarian, I've love being outdoors." The red-head frowned slightly. "Honestly I'm kind of boring Wade, I read a lot, I love sappy movies, I love to cook but never do because it's never fun to cook for just yourself." She shrugged slightly.

Wade smiled, "I don't think your boring."

Hannah felt her cheeks flush. "Thank you." She said as she took a bite of the pasta.

"Do you like it?"

"It is delicious." She nodded.

"Good." He smiled and ate some, before taking a sip of his wine. "I didn't ask if you drank Hannah, that was rude of me."

"I like red wine." She assured him. "It's about time you tell me more about yourself Wade."

He smiled sheepishly but nodded. "Well, I'm from Manchester. I was married for five years but my wife passed away from cancer three years ago. I also love animals, and the outdoors, and cooking. You've seen my book collection, so you know I love reading. I prefer action movies but I'm sure you could convince me to watch a romance with you, I have a degree in Marine Biology but I've never actually worked as a marine biologist, and I love boxing."

"Boxing?" she questioned. She looked up at him, that wasn't something she was expecting.

"I worked as a bare-knuckle boxer to pay my way through college." He shrugged.

"I never would have guessed you liked boxing." She said.

"Well, I do." He smiled.

"I'm sorry about your wife Wade."

He shifted his gaze momentarily and sighed. "I am too Hannah, but I've learned that I need to continue living, she would want that."

Hannah nodded. "Yes. She would." They ate quietly for a moment before Hannah looked up at him. "Do you like music Wade?"

"Does anyone dislike music? I'm sure that would be a sin."

Hannah laughed, "it should be."

"I love music."

"What kind?" Hannah questioned before she took another bite of pasta.

"Rock; classic rock."

"Good choice." She said. They fell into a discussion about the different musicians as they ate. When they finished their meal Hannah helped him carry everything back to the kitchen. She began to wash the dishes as he served up the desert he made.

"You shouldn't do those Hannah, that's not what you do on a date."

"Sorry I'm not educated in dating etiquette." The red-head laughed as she finished the last plate. "it was the least I could do seeing you made this lovely dinner." She smiled, extremely happy that she had agreed to go on the date with Wade.

"It was my pleasure Hannah." He said as he carried two dishes out to the bay window in the living room. Hannah grabbed her bag and followed behind. She sat down beside him and took the plate he handed her.

"Thank you." She said.

"You're very welcome."

They began to eat the desert and Hannah found herself glancing out the large bay window.

"Do you like the view?" he asked.

"It's beautiful." She nodded, she watched as a small rabbit hopped across the yard toward the woods.

"It's part of the reason I picked this house." He nodded. "It's a beautiful sight to wake up to."

"I'm sure." She sighed when her cell phone rang. "I'm really sorry." She sat down the plate and took her phone out of her purse. She didn't recognize the number. She thought about ignoring it but than decided against it. She flipped open the phone and held it to her ear. "Hello?"

"Is this Hannah Brooks?" a male voice questioned.

"Yes, I'm Hannah Brooks."

"Your brother asked us to contact you; he'd like to speak to you."

Phil? Phil was trying to contact her. "Please put him on." She said as she rose from her seat. She noticed the worry in Wade's green eyes and quickly waved it away. He nodded.

"Hannah?" she heard her brother's voice. "Hannah, are you there?"

"Yea, Phil I'm here. Happy Birthday."

"Not really sis." He said. She noticed the heat in his voice and it bothered her.

"Phil what's wrong."

"Sis I really need your help."

"What's wrong Phil?" she asked her heart racing. What was wrong with her brother?

"Hannah, I've been arrested." He said. "Please I really need your help, can you come please?" he pleaded with her.

"I'll be right there Phil. Just hold tight okay." She said.

"Thank you sis."

"You're welcome Phil; I'll be there as soon as I can." The red-head hung up the phone and turned to her date. "Wade, I'm really sorry. I've had an amazing time tonight, you are an amazing guy but I have to go." She said as she tried to shove her phone into her hand bag, but continued to miss because of her shaking hands. Her mind was racing a hundred miles an hour. Phil was in jail, she needed to get home...

"Hannah, you need to relax. What is going on?" Wade said patiently as he took the phone from her hand and placed it inside her purse. He seized her hand and squeezed it gently.

"it's my brother, he needs me, he was arrested, I don't know why but he was really upset. I need to go back to Chicago and help him." She said.

He nodded. "Hannah, it's almost eleven o'clock at night. You won't be able to help him until morning, why don't you wait and we'll get you a flight."

"No, no I can't I have to go now." She said. "Please Wade just take me back to my car."

"You aren't thinking about driving all the way out there now are you?" he said disapprovingly.

"He's my brother." She objected.

"I know but you are a nervous wreck, you need to get your composure first."

"He needs me know Wade." Hannah looked up at him.

He sighed and nodded. "Okay than Hannah, I'm driving you." He said.

"No, no you don't have to do that, I'm not even sure how long I'll be there." She said, shocked.

"Then I will go and quickly pack a bag while you go and make a cup a tea and try to calm down, then we will go to your house and you will pack a back and we will get some coffee and we will go straight to Chicago."

"But I can't take up your time-"

"Please let me help you Hannah." He held her hand gently. "It will make me feel better to know you are safe."

Hannah smiled and nodded. "Okay, okay. You can drive."

He smiled and nodded. He quickly ran up the stairs to retrieve his things and she took her seat but the window. _What a crazy night. _

* * *

**an.** I think this is one of the longest chapters I've ever written. What did you guys think? Do you like Wade? Do you think he will be good for Hannah? How do you think things will go for Hannah and Phil when they see each other for the first time in months? Reviews are always appreciated. Besos!


	6. Chapter 6

**Lost  
**_"The only good thing about going to the fights is you can go into the green room and you can see some of your old friends that you haven't seen in a long time."  
_Robert Goulet

* * *

Hannah waited just outside the large metal door that led to the cells. Wade was already at the hotel. He had stopped and insisted that she take his car, saying that she needed to have some time with her brother without him there. He was probably right.

That didn't make it any easier.

She fidgeted as she waited, hoping, even with the current circumstances, Phil would be happy to see her again. Even if he had hurt her feelings, she had missed him. She raked her fingers through her short, red hair and sighed.

She was about to take a seat when, the door opened and guard escorted Phil out. He was dressed in black shorts and tee-shirt, most likely the clothes he had been wearing when he was arrested. The officer removed the handcuffs that were fastened around his wrists in front of his body. "Don't miss your court date, Mr. Brooks… or we'll be seeing you again." The cop smiled before disappearing behind the door once again.

Hannah took a step toward her brother, who hadn't moved a muscle since the cop removed the handcuffs. He was thinner. His hair was short and unkempt. She looked at him for a long moment before running forward and throwing her arms around him.

She breathed a sigh of relief when his arms wrapped around her waist, hugging her tightly. "I've missed you Phil. I'm so sorry I upset you."

"Thank you for coming to get me out Hannah." He managed to say after a long moment.

Hannah nodded, when she finally released him from her embrace. "Let's get you home." She escorted him out of the police station to Wade's car.

"That's a pretty fancy car, sis. How did you get it?" Phil asked as he slid into the passenger seat.

"It's not mine," Hannah answered truthfully as she buckled her seat belt and started the engine.

"Whose is it then?"

"A friends," Hannah wasn't sure how to describe Wade.

"What kind of friend?"

Hannah sighed. _He knew her too well. _"He's, kind of, my boyfriend."

"kind of?"

"We've only been on one date… and you interrupted it."

"And he let you take his car," Phil looked skeptical.

"No Phil, he drove me here." Hannah easily maneuvered through the early morning traffic. "None of that is important right now. Why don't you tell me how you got arrested?"

"Assault," Phil shrugged as he looked out the passenger side window.

"That's it. You haven't picked a fight in years. Why now?"

"It was him."

"Him who," Hannah questioned as she turned onto their block.

"Matt. He delivered my pizza. I saw him and I lost it. He didn't even care Hannah. How can you cause someone's death and feel nothing?"

Hannah sighed, "I'm sorry Phil. Not everyone cares as much as you do." It was the only answer she had. She said a silent prayer of gratitude as she pulled the car into the driveway. She wasn't sure what she would have said to her brother if she had kept talking. Probably something like _Amy wouldn't want you picking fights over her, _and Phil would have been pissed off all over again.

Hannah cut the engine as Phil climbed out of the car. She tucked the keys into the pocket of her faded jeans as she got out and closed the door. Phil was already half way up the sidewalk.

A slender blonde in jeans and a white tank-top approached him, "Hey, I know you just got home but I wanted to see if you were okay. Is there anything I can do?" She sounded sweet. She smiled kindly at Phil and tucked a few locks of curly blonde hair behind her ear.

Phil looked at her for a second before turning and going into the house.

The blonde sighed and crossed her arms. She frowned, clearly hurt. _Hannah would have a talk with Phil about that, later. _

"Hey, I'm Hannah. I'm really sorry for the way Phil just acted. I think he's just had a long night."

"If I didn't know better, I'd think he hated me." The blonde gave a weak smile to show she was only half kidding.

"No, like I said, he just had a bad night." Hannah held out her hand. "I'm Phil's younger sister."

"I'm Barbie. It's nice to meet you."

"It's nice to meet you too. I'll have a talk with Phil about being kinder to his neighbors."

"It's okay. You're right. He probably just had a long night. I'll check on him later, if that's okay?"

"Absolutely, he should be feeling better by then." Hannah smiled and headed toward the house. "I'll see you around Barbie," Hannah waved when she reached the porch. She watched as the blonde scampered off toward her house.

_Now it was time to deal with Phil._

* * *

Disclaimer: I only own Hannah and this crazy plot.

**an. **Hey, I know this was a short chapter, but it's been awhile. I'm trying to get back into the swing of updating. I've been feeling rather…uninspired, lately. This is the only story, besides Someone Like You, that I still have any desire to write. I'm trying to get my spark back, but until then updates might be a little slow. I'll be coming back soon though, once I can get some of these stories finished, with a new organized vengeance. Anyways, I hope this chapter was somewhat enjoyable. In the next chapter Phil and Hannah will talk and Phil will meet Wade. I hope those of you who were reading this story are still interested in it. ~Danie.


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